Unintended Consequences
by the archduke
Summary: See that pairing right there? Yeah, not a typo. And it's all Spencer's fault.


**A/N**: Just something to try to get me back in the writing mood. This story doesn't really center around the Benson and Puckett moms, just that they're the catalyst for it.

"Unintended Consequences"

by: the archduke

"Can life get any better than this?"

Sam thought for a moment. "It would be cool if I could fly."

Freddie amended his question. "Can life get _realistically_ better than this?"

Sam shook her head. "Nope. No school, no work, no moms. Plenty of food. Everything's chill."

Freddie and Sam smiled at each other from their individual beanbags as they raised their smoothie cups in a toast.

Carly walked into the studio carrying a large platter of fruit. "I've brought fruit from Spencer. He sculpted the watermelon balls into little brains, and the melon balls into globes. He was obviously very bored today."

"Ah, Spencer," Sam sighed as she made a grab for a handful of faux brains. "He is my number one favorite person of all time. " She gave an apologetic look towards Carly. "Sorry Carls."

Carly shook her head as she brought the platter over to Freddie. "Hey, what's almost a decade of best friendship compared to one good idea? Sure, I might have nursed you when you were sick and kept you out of jail, but Spencer, well, he made an offhand comment that turned out to benefit you. No contest, really."

Freddie mumbled as he spoke around the fruit in his mouth. "I think she's being sarcastic."

"Naw, really?" Carly responded as she sat down in her own beanbag.

"Carly, don't be mad. You know you'll always be my number one girl," Sam said in a cajoling voice.

"Mine too," Freddie piped in. Sam turned and threw a mini fruit globe that hit him square on the forehead.

"Carly will never love you," she recited. She turned her attention back to Carly, ignoring Freddie's indignant muttering.

"It's just that Spencer saved my life. Without him, I would have killed my mom, gotten arrested, then executed for murder. I'd be dead without him," Sam reasoned. "And I guess my mom would be too," she added on as an afterthought.

Carly rolled her eyes. "You would never have murdered your mom, you big ole drama queen. At worst you would have run away from home and come lived here with me. Spencer didn't save anybody."

"Well," Freddie began, jumping into the conversation once more, "he definitely saved me. One more mommy and me class and something bad was going to happen." Freddie paused. "Something very, very bad."

Carly and Sam glanced at each other, momentarily spooked by Freddie's tone and the slightly unhinged look in his eyes.

"Okay," Carly said with hesitation in her voice, trying to steer the conversation away from the crazy direction Freddie had been going. "I'll agree that Spencer's idea was a good one. It got you both out of bad situations."

"His idea got my mom to stop going out with guys who steal our crap and eat our food. Sure, I'll miss getting stuff for free, but the last one was eating my ham. That is jank." Sam's anger was building just thinking about walking into her kitchen after school and finding that cheese ball eating her ham. Her mother had awful taste in men.

"And I'd be doing some lame class like mother-son welding if it wasn't for Spence," Freddie added in. He owed Spencer big time for ending the horrors of those classes.

"While helpful, Spencer's idea wasn't exactly genius thinking. He just said that your moms needed a friend so they'd stop with the random guys and the overwhelming smothering. I'm sure he didn't know that they'd become best friends and leave you two alone. Nobody could have thought those two women would ever get along." Carly herself thought the plan Sam and Freddie had come up with after Spencer's seemingly innocuous remark would have failed miserably. But surprisingly, the different brands of crazy of Sam's and Freddie's mothers seemed to cancel each other out when they were together and they ended up becoming inseperable.

Sam smiled, "Well they did, and we have Spencer to thank for that. I don't care what those two nut bars do when they go out all night, as long as they leave me and Fredneck here alone. Am I right, or am I right?" Sam said as she held out her fist for a bump from Freddie.

Freddie obliged her. "You are right, my spawn of Satan friend."

Just then, both Sam's and Freddie's phones went off, Sam's vibrating and Freddie's playing the Galaxy Wars theme. They checked their phones then looked at each other. "Mom wants to meet me at your place," Sam said to Freddie. He nodded. "Same with me."

An excited grin formed on Sam's face. "Maybe they've got a surprise. Like they'll be going away on one of those singles cruises for a week. Can you imagine, total freedom for a whole week? Think of how awesome that would be!"

Carly, who was listening to her two friends, did not find this awesome. Images of burning buildings, floods, wildfires and other disasters flittered through her mind. Sam should never, ever have total freedom.

Freddie and Sam were making their way down the stairs to the Bensons' apartment, Carly following after them, hoping the news her friends were about to get did not lead to a state of emergency.

Spencer came out of his room, just as Sam and Freddie got to the door of the apartment. They gave him a big smile. "Dude, you are the best!" Sam said as Freddie gave Spencer two thumbs up. They then left the apartment, leaving a befuddled Spencer behind.

"Uh, thanks?" Spencer said, looking questioningly at Carly.

"You're their new best friend," Carly said in a monotone, still irritated at her two friends for their lack of loyalty.

"Neat!" Spencer said with a smile as he made his way back to the kitchen.

"Don't you want to know why?" Carly asked.

"Nope," Spencer replied. "It's just nice being appreciated."

**A/N**: Not too happy with this, but at least it's got me writing something semi-coherent.


End file.
